Many gay men over 50 who have recently married assume that marriage itself takes care of the legal protection and estate planning they need. It does not. While marriage provides important default legal protections, these are far from comprehensive and do not eliminate the need for explicit estate planning documents.

Most gay men over 50 who will eventually need elder care have not made meaningful plans for how that care will be provided — even those who are thoughtful and organized in other dimensions of their lives. The planning paradox is that the time to make these plans is when you are healthiest and least in need of care — which is also when it is easiest to avoid the subject.

Gay men who approach career change with inadequate financial planning often find themselves making decisions under financial pressure that compromise the quality of their reinvention. Those who plan carefully — understanding their financial position clearly, modeling multiple scenarios, making changes on a timeline their finances can sustain — execute reinventions that actually work.